Behind the Hustle E.03// The 54 Billion Dollar Wedding Industry

Nick DeSantis

Hey everybody, this is Nick DeSantis from The Hustle. Thanks for tuning in to another episode of *Behind the Hustle*, the show where we bring you inside some of the stories that we are working on and introduce you to some of the interesting people in our world. For today's episode, I wrote a story for our newsletter last week about the **$54 billion** wedding industry that has really fallen on hard times right now. Obviously, that's true for pretty much anyone associated with the events world. Couples across the country are canceling their wedding plans or, in some cases, postponing them. This has thrown the entire industry into a little bit of chaos. However, there are a few couples who decided to go through with their weddings anyway, using technology like Zoom, Facebook Live, or some of the other platforms that are out there. What was especially interesting about this story is that after we published it last week, one of our readers reached out to us and said, "Yeah, actually, my wife and I did this a couple of days ago, and we'd love to talk to you about it." I thought their story was really interesting and wanted to share it with all of you. So, I'm here to welcome in Dan and Jen Wilson, who live in Orlando, Florida, and will be celebrating two weeks as newlyweds this coming Saturday. Welcome to you both!

Dan Willson

thank you thanks for having us

Nick DeSantis

Yeah, I really appreciate it. So, I think the first thing that I want to ask you is something that everybody wants to know. We talked about it a little bit the other day. How did the two of you meet?

Jen Willson

go ahead

Dan Willson

Yeah, so we met. How fitting for a virtual wedding! We actually met online, on a dating site called Tinder, which I'm sure everyone is familiar with. So, Tinder actually works! So, yep.

Jen Willson

I was actually moving to Jacksonville, and I wanted to meet new people. I met Dan my first week there, so it worked out well.

Nick DeSantis

Did anything in particular stand out about that first Tinder date? I know that some people have memorable first dates.

Jen Willson

it's probably the most normal date I've been on yeah

Dan Willson

We, we, we... I think both did a pretty good job of, you know, setting our profiles in such a way to attract people that were maybe like-minded. We did, I think, a fair bit of text screening beforehand to see if, yeah, you know, someone can actually complete a thought or have similar interests and things like that before we met face to face.

Jen Willson

it's a pretty normal dinner

Dan Willson

yeah yeah

Jen Willson

yeah great dinner

Nick DeSantis

Tell us a little bit about the proposal and sort of then what went into the planning.

Dan Willson

Yeah, so it's something that's kind of been on my mind. You know, this April marks six years we've been together. Over the last couple of years, I know it's something I've been wanting to move forward with and ask Jen to marry me. There was really no question in my mind that that's the route I wanted to go. But it was about trying to think through the different options of how to propose. I wanted something that was maybe more practical versus something romantic, and things like that. I just didn't quite have a good feeling of how to do it until really last summer. We were on vacation out in Colorado, and I thought, "Yeah, this could be a good time." So, I basically went and got a ring—a Kalo ring. We chose the silicone rings. I went to a running store in the morning before we went for a hike and bought a couple of rings, just hoping to determine which size and style she might like. I thought, "I'll grab a couple and see what happens." Jen was looking in another part of the store, so I went to the cashier and said, "I need to buy these really, really quick," because that would kind of ruin everything. I got them, shoved them in my pocket, and we walked around. Then we went on our hike, and I just had them in my pocket. As we got towards higher elevations, the people on the trail started to thin out. I thought, "I better do this pretty soon while I can." I ended up convincing a couple of college kids to help. I gave them my camera to take video, and then Jen gave them her camera for pictures. I wanted to get video while she got pictures on hers. You know, doing that...

Jen Willson

It was... I was completely surprised. I was like, "Why do you want a video? What do you want a video for? Well, just take pictures."

Nick DeSantis

and

Jen Willson

then he proposed it was very sweet

Nick DeSantis

Very cool, very cool. So, you told me a little bit about what you had planned for the wedding. Obviously, I don't think anybody goes into planning their wedding thinking that Facebook Live or Zoom is really going to play a role in the celebration. But you guys found yourselves in that situation pretty quickly. So, tell us a little bit about what you were planning and then how quickly you had to turn once you realized that that was not really going to be an option.

Jen Willson

Right, so we had planned a smaller wedding with about 50 people. Since we met in Jacksonville, we decided that's where we wanted to have it. It was going to be simple: married in a park and then have the reception at one of our favorite breweries in the backroom area there. We started to get text messages and calls from some friends who were planning on coming to the wedding. They said, "You know, I don't think I'm going to be able to come," with everything that was just starting to happen. For quite a while, we thought we would still get married on the same day, and maybe a smaller amount of people would be there. But it became very clear quickly that we wouldn't be able to do that. So, we very much planned, and then kind of unplanned, and pivoted the entire wedding. We let people know that we weren't going to be able to have it. One, we didn't feel comfortable having it, and two, we couldn't have it if we wanted to because the brewery and all of the restaurants were obviously closed or just doing takeout type of things. That's when we decided to pivot. For us, our decision was that the two of us were the most important things. We still wanted to get married, and we figured we could use technology in order to do that.

Nick DeSantis

Yeah, and I would say one of the things that was cool is your whole ceremony was posted to Facebook, and you can go and watch it. I did that, and it was beautiful and looked great. One of the things that was actually really cool about it is you could see in the comments threads underneath the video. There was sort of anticipation starting to build as people were taking selfies with drinks and cheering in [the] lawn. Tell us a little bit about what that was like to see that anticipation build up.

Jen Willson

yeah go ahead

Dan Willson

Yeah, it was cool. I mean, I think there was some way we created the event. So, kind of pivoting a little bit from something where we wanted a smaller in-person wedding, just because of costs and venue restrictions as far as size and things like that. But since we made the decision to go virtual, it was like, "Well, let's open it up to more people and invite people to watch." So, that was kind of neat to include more people that, you know, I guess not that they were better friends or not or whatever, but just, you know, maybe people that would have had challenges traveling further or, you know, with family obligations or work obligations, things like this. So, I felt like we were able to actually share it with a lot more people.

Jen Willson

a lot more people

Dan Willson

A broader group than maybe we would have in person, with a little bit smaller group that way.

Jen Willson

Yeah, so I mean it was awesome to see the virtual part of it and everyone. We also had a couple of people in the neighborhood who we're friends with, and they figured out where we were doing it. They showed up, obviously from a very far distance, but they were still able to watch. So that also made it pretty cool.

Nick DeSantis

And so, tell us a little bit about the interesting moment where you're actually going live on Facebook. Tell us a little bit about the technology setup and how you were able to navigate that in the moment when your heart's probably beating out of your chest. You're in a situation where you have to make sure that the technology works.

Jen Willson

We did FaceTime with our friend who was marrying us, and he was in Jacksonville. So, we had one screen that was used for FaceTime, and then we had the computer, which we used for Facebook. We actually did a trial run a couple of days before, and we also had to figure out where we could get Wi-Fi in.

Dan Willson

the neighborhood

Jen Willson

And have a backdrop that looks, you know, somewhat nice for a ceremony. So, all the logistics of figuring that out and the time of day, because it's Florida and it's already pretty hot. So, yeah, we had to adjust that a little bit too.

Dan Willson

so we had a little

Nick DeSantis

warning if I if I'm not mistaken is that right yeah

Jen Willson

yeah it was 11 am yeah

Dan Willson

So that was, you know, intentional because, you know, with the jacket on and the clothing, I didn't want to... I was already sweating like crazy anyway. But we had a little pre-production check on the technology just to kind of see, well, it should work. It looks like we've got pretty good Wi-Fi. Let's cross our fingers and hope it stands up.

Jen Willson

yeah it seemed to work

Nick DeSantis

So, the technology went really smoothly. Were there other logistical bumps in the road that you hit? You know, there are all sorts of essentials around a cake, flowers, and a dress. Did you have any trouble with those essentials?

Jen Willson

well the night before we went to the grocery store and got our wedding cake

Dan Willson

sure

Jen Willson

And flowers, so we can have a bouquet. I would say probably 15 minutes before the wedding, the gardener went by with the blower. So that was a little nerve-wracking. I thought, "That's not gonna work." An important part of our wedding was our dog as well. So, geez, we brought her and thought that she would kind of settle down, but she...

Dan Willson

went crazy

Jen Willson

she kinda went crazy

Dan Willson

She was just doing laps in the area there and... yeah, wanted to be right next to us. They only had a hiccup on it. We didn't talk earlier in your dress, that was...

Jen Willson

Yeah, the dress... well, the dress had gotten lost about a month before the wedding. So there were some things we had to do. I ended up getting the dress, which was amazing, and it was beautiful. But yeah, it was a scary month of not knowing what I was going to wear.

Nick DeSantis

Hopefully not something that had to come together at the 11th hour, like the cake. Alright, good. So, tell us a little bit about the reaction you had from friends and family. I'm sure there were people who were bummed, obviously, that they couldn't be there in person. But as I said earlier, the ease of connectivity makes it potentially easier for people to participate, especially if they had to come in from farther away. So, I'm curious about what you heard from friends and family regarding how it went.

Jen Willson

Yeah, I actually think it was awesome. We had so many comments on our Facebook page and, as Dan mentioned, from people, acquaintances, and coworkers. I actually feel like it made the day extra special.

Dan Willson

mhmm

Jen Willson

To have so many comments and people posting and liking... You saw the photos and people celebrating. We even FaceTimed with folks afterwards who wanted to talk with us and share in the experience. I thought it was awesome.

Dan Willson

Yeah, no, I agree. I think it was just a great experience to share with a broader group of friends, family, coworkers, and ex-coworkers. It was nice to have our circle there to share the day with. From the ceremony standpoint, I think we still envision having an in-person celebration party, if you will, hopefully this fall when schedules align. But for the day, I thought it was great to be able to share it that way.

Nick DeSantis

That's great! So you went through the ceremony, obviously, and it went off without a hitch. But one thing that we talked about the other day is that the shutdowns did disrupt your honeymoon plans.

Jen Willson

that too yes

Dan Willson

Yeah, we had a trip to Germany planned. We both are into triathlons, and I was fortunate enough to get into a race in Roth, Germany—Challenge Roth. That was on July 5th. So, we were going to do the race on the front end and then stay extra in Germany for our honeymoon. However, that got canceled recently, which I figured it would probably happen about a month or so ago, just because of the state of the world. There was no way they would have it. So, the honeymoon has been deferred for a little bit, and we've got to figure that out.

Jen Willson

when b

Dan Willson

Plan B... Yeah, when and where? So, I'm still going to do the race next year, but you know, maybe we do something.

Jen Willson

we'll we'll probably do a honeymoon whenever we can travel yeah at least somewhere yeah

Nick DeSantis

Yeah, well, I hope that the race goes well when you're able to get back to it next year. One of the things I'm also curious to hear your perspective on is that we're edging into prime wedding season in the U.S. There are a lot of couples who are having to make similar choices to the ones that you did. I'd be curious for other couples who might be in your shoes, thinking about whether to do this virtually or postpone. What are some of the factors that you would recommend they weigh? What advice would you have for others who are in your shoes?

Dan Willson

You know, I think as we sit here in early to mid-April, weddings that may be planned for May and probably into June have a pretty high likelihood of not going off as planned, especially anything of size. In our personal opinion, the virus will plateau and settle down a little bit, but I don't know that it will be an overnight rush back to sporting events with thousands of people or congregations of 50, 100, 200, or 300 people for a wedding. So, I think over the next couple of months, as restrictions lift, it might be more of a smaller venue, more intimate. If that is what the couple is looking to do, perhaps you can still accommodate something like that. However, I think anything larger than that in the near term is going to have to either be deferred until later in the year or look at other options, like virtual events or downsizing for now. Down the road, having a larger event may be a little different, but for now...

Jen Willson

Yeah, I think it'll come down to personal preference and what's important to the couple. Is it having everybody there in person? If it is, it may be worth deferring it. But I will say that doing it virtually, I know we were both disappointed we couldn't have friends and family there together. In the end, it was such a special day for us. All the comments, all the videos, you know, people just driving by and honking, saying, "Hey, congrats!" It just made the day special, just in a different way. So I think it's just a preference on how you want to do it and how you plan for it. I know the logistics of big weddings is a lot more, so that's the other thing—just talking with vendors and figuring out what they can do, can they do it later, and how that all plays out. It's a big consideration when you have a wedding, especially if it's a big one.

Nick DeSantis

Definitely. So you'll be celebrating 2 weeks on Saturday, but it's been, I would imagine, 2 weeks in quarantine in self-isolation. How have the past 2 weeks been for the two of you?

Dan Willson

Great! I mean, you know, I think it's more about maintaining the status quo to some degree. I mean, we've been together now for six years, and yes, I think it's nice to have that special bond, you know? But I think the day-to-day is not terribly different, other than the fact that we're kind of cooped up a little bit. Fortunately, here in Florida, we are able to get out and go for a run. We have the weather that allows us to do that, or go for a bike ride or something like that, certainly keeping our distance from people and things like that. So, we can get away a little bit if we need to, but I think it's been great.

Jen Willson

Yeah, I agree. It's been an awesome two weeks. We tried to make the day extra special and feel that way, and I feel like it did. Then we kind of got back into the normal groove of things, so...

Nick DeSantis

Have you thought at all about one thing that people always ask me? It's sort of, "What are the first couple of things that you're going to do when you're able to be out in society again?" Have you thought about that at all?

Dan Willson

it's a good question

Jen Willson

Yeah, I know for me, like he had mentioned, we're triathletes. So, it's that time of year when there's a lot of races. It'd be nice to do a race.

Dan Willson

yeah

Jen Willson

And traveling, I know for me, I would love to just go somewhere and get out a little bit more.

Dan Willson

Yeah, I say, you know, see friends... get together at some of the local spots. You know, restaurants, various bars, spots that we have... kind of the regulars and friends and such that we typically see. We haven't been able to catch up with and meet up with [them] personally, which would be nice to be able to do again.

Nick DeSantis

Totally! Well, we'll all look forward to it. I really appreciate you all coming on and telling us about your special day. We're just in such an unbelievable time right now. I'm glad that, given the tough choices that the two of you had to make, and that it didn't work out—maybe it wasn't your ideal—it was still something that you can look back on. It's sort of special in its own right.

Jen Willson

yeah definitely absolutely yeah

Dan Willson

thanks for having us nick

Nick DeSantis

we appreciate it congratulations to both of you and and thanks for coming on really appreciate it

Dan Willson

yeah thank you thank you take care

Nick DeSantis

take care

Jen Willson

alright bye bye