Couples Give Leftover Energy

Shaan Puri shares his perspective on how having young children affects relationship dynamics with his wife, highlighting the challenge of energy distribution between various life commitments.

• Energy Distribution in Marriage with Young Kids:

  • Work takes significant energy
  • Fitness requires dedicated effort
  • Children demand substantial attention
  • Relationship gets "whatever is left over at the end of the day"

• Current State of Acceptance:

  • Both partners have settled into this dynamic
  • Rationalize it with "they're not leaving, they're not going anywhere"
  • Acknowledge it's not ideal but view it as temporary
  • Treat relationship maintenance as lower priority

• Recognition of the Issue:

  • Aware they're "settling" in their relationship
  • Taking each other for granted
  • Using the presence of young children as justification
  • Treating relationship effort as "scraps" of remaining energy

• Partner's Perspective:

  • Both partners have mutually accepted this arrangement
  • Neither actively working to change the dynamic
  • Comfortable with current state despite knowing it's not optimal

This represents a common challenge for couples with young children, where immediate demands often overshadow long-term relationship maintenance.